Raising a holistically fit child in this world… We love them like no other. They drive us crazy. In a good way, of course. We can’t escape them. Not for one second. Let’s be honest, we really don’t want to (except when we need privacy in the bathroom). Our kids. They are our lives. Our entire lives.
They drive us to drink an abundance of wine and even on a GNO we spend most, if not all of the evening talking about them. Sharing all the cute things they do, bragging about them and asking for advice when we can’t seem to get them to act the way we want them to. Even when we finally go out on a date night after say 6 or even 12 months, we spend at least 130 of the 180 minutes talking about them before our carriage turns into a pumpkin.
They consume us in the best way. They are our biggest and most important “job” in life and we are doing everything we can not to screw this up. If you’ve only got one, like me, you’ve got one shot. One shot to get it right. Lucky you if you’ve got three kids… screw up the first and/or second, well, third times a charm!
When my husband and I go out on a date, which is rare (because I hate leaving her), we kiss her goodbye and close the door. It only takes 60 seconds until I start talking about her.
“Isn’t she just the sweetest when she wakes up and snuggles with us in the morning.”
“I wonder what she’s doing with the sitter right now.”
“I can’t wait to see her play soccer tomorrow.”
“She’s our best friend.”
“Want to FaceTime her?”
GNOs are a little different. This is a time where we, as women, bond as mothers and complain about how we do it all and how tired we are day in and out. Misery invites company. This is also the time we want to hear the answers to our parenting challenges. I find that every 6 months, the challenges seem to be changing. And as our kids get older, and become a little more independent, the challenges naturally become more complex.
Now that the toddler days are way behind us, I find myself talking to girlfriends and seeking advice about my daughter’s relationship with her own friends. She’s only in 4th grade but today is not the elementary school days of the 80s. Elementary school relationships seem to be more intricate now. Is that accurate or am I “old” for saying, “things were simpler in our days.” I find most of the conversations between us moms center around the handling of iPad usage, social media, deodorant choices, gender specification, study habits, their already existing attitudes, etc etc etc. What I’m taking from these conversations , no matter the topic, is that we all want our children to grow up with individual balance and we are all seeking the best way to teach this to them.
My husband and I introduced our daughter, Nyeema, to the 5 Spheres of Fit. She’d heard us talking about the 5 Spheres for a few years but her 9 year old brain didn’t comprehend the concepts of a “lifestyle” and finding “balance”. But like everything else, we figured if we start teaching her how to conceptualize her 5 spheres now – the physical, mental, financial, social, and educational – we can set her up for continued success. Sounds too complicated for a kid, does it? Not at all, my friend.
This past October, Nyeema and I started journaling her 5 spheres so she could visualize a snapshot of her “challenges” and where she felt unbalanced. This is teaching her to (1) organize, (2) evaluate and (3) problem solve. I, of course, guided her through questions she had but encouraged her to fill her 5 Spheres out on her own.
Nyeema’s 5 Spheres (October 2022)
Obviously, as parents, we will have to do our job to help our child overcome these challenges. Have I not been feeding my daughter enough vegetables?!?! And if I’ve noticed she is getting crankier more often, what is the cause? How do we get to the root of these problems?
It has been important for us to teach Nyeema the following:
- We have 5 spheres that encompass who we are. We can’t just focus on one or two spheres. We need to take a holistic approach to life and be as fit as we can in each of the 5 areas.
- If you write down your challenges, your mind feels less overwhelmed. It then becomes easier to organize, evaluate and problem solve.
- Recognize that our spheres perpetually co-exist, and one or all may be impacted by another. By taking a screen shot of our spheres at a point in time, we can center our focus and get to the root cause of our challenges.
- You can review your spheres as often as you like. Daily, monthly, yearly. This is your life.
Since October, we have continued to review her spheres and address where we are with each challenge. Have we taken the steps to alleviate the challenges? Do we even have the tools to do so?
My goal for Nyeema is to understand the balance and importance of her life’s spheres and for her to look at her life holistically. My goal through this blog, is to share this strategy with others and provide content to not only help your kids, but for you to learn how to implement this in your everyday life.
I look forward to sharing more as I deep dive into each sphere through this blog. Remember, the beauty of this is that each person owns their individual 5 spheres – PERSONAL ACCOUNTABILITY! It’s 5 Spheres fore the best version of YOU!
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